


feelings are fatal

by polarvoidz



Category: Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rick Riordan, The Heroes of Olympus - Rick Riordan, The Trials of Apollo - Rick Riordan
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Minor Annabeth Chase/Percy Jackson, Nico di Angelo Needs a Hug, Protective Reyna Avila Ramírez-Arellano, Protective Will Solace, Slow Burn, Trans Nico di Angelo, Trans Will Solace, Unrequited Crush, Will Solace is a Dork
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-28
Updated: 2020-10-29
Packaged: 2021-03-08 22:15:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,951
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27254035
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/polarvoidz/pseuds/polarvoidz
Summary: Nico Di Angelo has had an unrequited crush on Percy Jackson for years. He's tried to move on, but memories swarm in his brain.A certain memory quite literally haunts him.Nearly a year passes and things seem to be going better-He's made new friends, eating slowly, finding a purpose-but a sudden change makes his world shatter and fall right beneath him. He starts to spiral, but a certain medic is there to make sure he's knows he's safe and alright.(Slow burn solangelo, fellas. Let's goooo!!!!)
Relationships: Annabeth Chase/Percy Jackson, Nico di Angelo & Percy Jackson, Nico di Angelo/Will Solace
Comments: 4
Kudos: 22





	1. Heartbreak.

It was cold.   
Fall was coming to a close with Winter just creeping up behind. Nico was on his way back to Cabin 13, he had taken a walk to clear his thoughts.  
The past few months had been horrible.   
His stupid crush of his- he and Nico had..gotten unexpectedly closer, but that didn't last long.  
In all honesty, Nico had felt like a complete idiot.. It was so unbelievably unrealistic that someone like Percy would care about him like _that_. Memories came rushing back. Nico pulled his jacket over his face as a sense of defense- again it was cold.. It wasn't suspicious.

Images flooded his mind. That stupid night had practically been _burned_ Into his brain.

This was months ago.

  
_The campers had been singing songs by the fire, telling stories; the usual._  
_Percy had practically dragged Nico from his cabin. It's not that he didn't want to go, he just..he didn't fit in._  
_The night was nice, although he felt a bit overwhelmed..but Percy was there._  
_Percy.._  
_His ocean eyes practically staring into the youngers soul, his hands.. warm on his own._

  
_Gods!_

  
The son of Hades could feel the heat creeping up his neck, he needed to get out of sight. 

Nico ran back towards his cabin, slamming the door behind him. His heart was racing, his head spinning.  
That image hadn't left Nico's mind.

Percy.. he had to have been intoxicated. Maybe a joke played by the Stoll brothers..it just didn't make sense.   
Nico shut his eyes tightly, steadying his breaths.

_Percy ruffled Nico's hair, his smile.. it was so fond. Gods, it couldn't have been meant for him._  
_"You should relax and have fun more, Nico." He spoke with a chuckle._  
_"It's..not that simple." The smaller had adverted his gaze, practically bearing holes into the ground. "Percy..Sorry but, you're too clos-"_  
_A hand moved to caress Nico's cheek._  
_He froze, his eyes going wide. He couldn't form any string of words- Percy was moving closer and he..he couldn't move. Was this some kind of sick joke? Cupid.. he was pulling this, right? Eros? Gods, why couldn't he catch a bre-_  
_Warmth._  
_Too..too much warmth._  
_Nico'a breath hitched as he felt the son of Poseidon's lips upon his own. It was soft, but..it felt wrong. It was intoxicating, mind numbing, it was too much._

It lasted only a few seconds, but _Hades_ did it feel like an eternity. 

That was _months_ ago. It didn't _matter_.  
Nico sighed to himself, pushing himself away from the door. It had happened a few days before his birthday.. January! He needed to forget about it already. Why was he.. why was he holding onto the slim chance that maybe his stupid crush has or.. had interest in him?  
Any other time around others, he treated Nico like..like a kid.

 _Hah._ Nico scoffed. _I'm several decades older than Jackson._

Nico was in the process of trudging towards his bed when he heard his door open.  
He turned in an instant, ready to kick whoever's ass just bursted in-

  
Ah.  
It was Will.

Will Solace- Child of Apollo.   
They had been friends for almost a year now.. Nico had been adjusting to live at camp slowly, he would often help Will out at the infirmary.

The sound of the door closing shook Nico out of his thoughts. He looked over to see the blonde, his suntanned arms were crossed paired with a dissatisfied look on his face.  
Did he.. forget something?

" _Yes_ \- You _did_ forget something!" He groaned.

  
Could.. children of Apollo read minds? Was that a thing? 

"I don't.. know what you're upset about.." Nico mumbled quietly. In all honesty, he thought he had the day off from Infirmary duties. He had spent most of the day walking by the lake, allowing himself to enjoy the cool of autumn..   
It reminded him of his semi "step-mother"- Persephone. She was probably with Hades already.

"Uh hello? Death boy?" Will tapped his foot angrily.  
Nico looked up again, holding back a huff of laughter. "Will.. it's hard to find you intimidating when you're angrily tapping a flip flop against the floor."   
Will simply sighed, walking over towards the smaller boy. "Remind me to _not_ help you medically next time you almost meet your dad down below." He looked around hesitantly. It was..kinda cute that he was scared the God of the underworld would smite him immediately.

"We were supposed to hang out by the arena! I set up a cool spot and everything."   
Nico played with his hair nervously. "Ah."  
"Ah?!?" Will was pouting now. "C'mon, death boy." He sighed, holding out his hand. "You can't keep cooped up in this cabin all the damn time."  
Nico squinted. "Language."   
"Gimme a pass for now, I was _ghosted_ by the ghost king himself." His lips formed into a pout. Nico was hesitant, but he took the olders hand and complied. "I was outside for most of today.."  
"Yeah? but you were all alone."  
"I like being alone.."  
"Stop brooding! The days still young and we're gonna have fun!"  
Nico snorted at the comment. What a weird cheesey guy. 

─❀*̥˚──◌─❀*̥˚

The spot Will had chosen was lovely.   
They were seated under a tree so there was plenty of shade, though the son of Apollo complained that a little sun wouldn't hurt Nico.   
The spot was out of the way enough that not many other campers would walk by.. it was secluded- Nico really appreciated that.   
"Soo.." Will held out the word longer than a norml person would have. "Are you having a good time?"  
Nico nodded slowly, a cracker shoved into his mouth. "I wike teh snacehs.", he uttered.   
"Don't talk while you're eating, death boy." Will laughed softly. "You could choke."  
Nico smirked, taking a sip of water. "Aren't you a doctor? Medico, lei è cosi crudele."   
Will's cheeks tinted pink for a moment before he looked away nervously. "I don't understand what you said, darlin'."  
_Ah, there it was._  
Nico felt his face warm up at the sudden nickname. Will had explained that it was just a term of endearment in the South but.. it would _almost_ make Nico's heart flutter.  
He played it off with a laugh, throwing a cracker at the blonde. "Your country boy accents coming back again!" He teased.  
Will frowned, catching the cracker before it could fall onto the grass. "Don't waste these! I brought 'em so you could eat." He shoved the cracker into the boys mouth, a smirk dancing on his lips. "Also my accents _always_ been here, death boy. Y'know it can just get thicker sometimes."   
Nico bit down on the cracker, rolling his eyes. "You don't have to dote on me all the time, Will." He sighed.  
Will had practically become his "caregiver" (as the campers called it) over the last year. He would make sure Nico ate, he slept, and _make sure he wouldn't shadow travel._  
The son of Hades would never admit it, but..   
he did..like the attention of being fussed over. Reyna would often do the same when he would visit her in New Rome.   
He knew he wasn't the healthiest, but he was trying..   
Will knew that and respected it.   
Will was.. really nice.

"Ah, I forgot to tell you, but you're working mornin' with me tomorrow."   
Nico groaned. "I don't want to."  
Will snickered. "You don't have much of a choice, Austin's going to see Mitchell's dad in New York with him tomorrow."   
Nico hummed in response. He let his back rest against the tree, letting out a long sigh. "5 AM, right?"  
"Y'know it."  
"I don't think I'll be able to wake up that early."  
"I'll come get you, drag you right outta bed of I gotta!"   
Nico laughed, slapping Will's arm gently. "Yeah, okay. Like _that's_ worked before."  
"Hmm. Maybe you've got a point there, death boy. You'd rather we have a sleepover in your cabin? Could always tell Chiron it's doctor's orders." He raised a brow, teasingly.  
Nico blinked, taken aback by the question. "That's.. my cabin's too cold for you..I think." He looked away nervously.  
"I'm kidding, Nico. Don't worry." Will stretched with a yawn. "Still dragging you up and at 'em at 5, though." 

─❀*̥˚──◌─❀*̥˚

Will was about to drop Nico off at his cabin when he saw a large group of girls bouncing around the dinner pavilion.   
It was.. time to eat, but Will would always take Nico by a bit later, (With Chiron's permission, of course.) he couldn't eat around large crowds of people.   
"What's.. going on?" Nico spoke quietly.   
"Uh.. wanna go see?"  
Nico nodded, shoving his hands into his jacket pockets- Will noticed that was a nervous habit the son of Hades had. 

  
The blonde led the way towards the crowd, and as he got closer he realized.. it was a lot of campers circling.. something.

  
Ah.  
_Someone_. 

  
In the center of all the commotion stood a very cocky looking Percy Jackson and kinda flustered mostly annoyed Annabeth Chase.   
"Alright.. what the heck is going on?" Will groaned, pushing past the other campers.  
Percy immediately noticed the two, smiling brightly. "Ah, Will! ..Nico! It's nice to see you."  
Will waved nervously. He didn't.. really know Percy too well. The only reason they ever talked was because they had one thing in common- _Nico_. And to be honest? He didn't like Nico around Percy.   
Nico would always get quiet, shy..   
More reserved.   
It was like all the hard work Nico had done for himself would disappear once Percy was around.  
As if on que, Nico muttered quietly. "Uh yeah. Nice to see you..both."  
The last word was.. _heavily_ muttered  
Will looked over to Nico to see his gaze adverted, his stance.. Nico was definitely tense.   
"No offense, but I thought there was a small riot being held against the nymphs for not having chicken nuggets again." Will rubbed his neck nervously. "Please tell me what the ruckus is all about?"  
"Oh!" Percy grinned, nudging Annabeth playfully.   
"Want me to tell them or you?"   
"Percy.. the whole camp practically knows, Gods probably the entirety of Camp Jupiter too!"  
"All the Gods too?" He waggled his eyebrows, teasingly. Annabeth groaned in response, punching his shoulder.   
"Fine, fine. I finally got Annabeth to admit she likes me too! We're finally dating after all the times she-"  
Time seemed to slow for a moment. Will quickly felt the presence next to him turn..cold. Way wayyy too cold.   
His eyes immediately moved to look towards the son of Hades. His eyes were wide, his pale skin looked even more sickly.   
"..Nico?"  
Dark eyes met sky blue for a brief moment before he ran off. Will gave an apologetic look towards the new couple before rushing to chase the younger down. He could see the shadows enveloping him slowly.  
" _Shit_.." Will muttered to himself. He had to stop him before he hurt himself again. "NICO!" 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter! I've started this project as a distraction from my own grievings and I'm excited to see where I take things !!  
> Sorry for the cliffhanger, haha  
> I promise some nice things will happen next chapter!


	2. Warmth.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! I really couldn't wait to post this chapter. It goes into Will's past a little bit, I hope you enjoy!

The words echoed loudly in Nico's head.  
He felt sick.  
 _Gods, he felt sick!_  
Was everything moving slower? He could've sworn everyone eye's were on him.   
They knew, they had to have known. He couldn't trust anyone.. He had to leave. 

"..Nico?"

His gaze looked upward to meet sky blue eyes-  
Panic filled his brain.  
His chest was suddenly tight, his vision blurring. Was this real? He didn't understand.  
Today was going so well.. why couldn't he have one nice day?   
He knew the entirety of Olympus was laughing at him. 

Nico ran. 

He sprinted off, tears threatening to fall.   
No one could see him like this, he would just need to bottle it up and ignore it.  
Crying over Jackson?  
Gods..that would be so pathetic. _He_ was pathetic.  
Of course the son of Hades just had to fall for a stupid straight boy. He wished Bianca was here. His breath hitched. Gods, she'd tell him from the beginning that this was wrong.  
Gods, what was wrong with him? There was so so much wrong with him. 

_I'm so stupid. I need to leave camp, I can't stay here. I've never fit in here, I-_

"NICO!" 

The voice threw him out of his thoughts.  
He felt.. sickly, but he wasn't sure if it was the anxiety this time. He look down towards his body, flinching at the sight. Shadows swam around his arms and legs, wrapping around him like a protective cocoon. He looked closer at his hands; He was _shaking_.   
Nico turned to where the voice had come from, a small smile tugging at his lips. 

The son of Apollo was practically stumbling as he rushed over to Nico's side. As soon as he was within proximity of the younger, Will wrapped his arms around him tightly. He needed to assure Nico that _he was still here_.   
It helped ground Nico. 

"I need you to breathe for me, okay?" He panted out. "Breathe for a sec, then we can..head to your cabin, kay? You're okay."

Nico felt himself melt into his touch.  
He was always.. _warm_. A year prior, Nico would have probably flinched and thrown the taller boy at the sudden touch. It had taken him a while to get (semi) used to the odd showings of affection, but as he helped at the infirmary more, he quickly learned that's just how the Apollo children were. He let out a small huff of a laugh, his eyes still threatening tears with a sting.   
"..What, is this doctor's orders too..?", He tried to say with his usual sass and stubbornness, but his words trailed off. He was scared that if he spoke another word he would break.  
Will let go of the younger, looking down at him with a small smile and a raised brow. "Yeah, want me to sign another note for you? C'mon, we should get to your cabin so you can relax." He held his hand out to the other, awaiting for his response.  
Nico took it hesitantly, allowing the other to lead him towards the dark building.

It was a short, quiet walk, but it was well needed. Nico felt really out of breath and he just wanted to lay down and sleep. 

Once inside the cabin, Will instructed Nico to take his jacket off immediately. The son of Hades rolled his eyes at the sudden instruction, but after meeting Will's gaze, he knew he meant it. 

"I need you to tell me what's going on, Nico." He's tone was stern, but his voice was soft. "You only tense up like that around Percy.. it's like you've seen a fucked up beast or something!"  
Nico threw his jacket at the blonde. " _Language!_ " Gods, he could swear he could hear his Roman Catholic mother yelling at him from Elysium.   
Will pouted, folding the jacket in his hands. "Sorry! I..just." He ran a hand through his hair with a sigh. "Let me check how you're doing real quick, please? I need you to take off your shirt so I can see something."   
Nico felt his ears pink. " _First_ of all, I've fought some weird gross looking monsters. Percy _isn't..anything_ compared to that." He smirked to himself smugly. "His brains too small."   
Will snorted, rolling his eyes at the comment. "Alright, death boy, but shirt off. Doctor's orders." 

That.. suggestion might have seemed suggestive from an outside perspective, but it had become normal for the two. Will was one of the only people at camp who.. knew of this certain thing. It made things both easier and harder.   
Nico knew this was a normal procedure, but he couldn't help but feel embarrassed in front of Will. For the love of the Gods, he was the son of Apollo! Gorgeous golden hair, skin that looked like it was kissed by the sun, and _Gods_ those sky blue eyes-

Nico shook his head violently.  
He.. had to only have been thinking that way because he was..the son of Apollo-!  
He met the God at a young age, the memory was both fun but..looking back at it, cursed. He had remembered how Thalia had called the Sun God "hot"- and not in the literal.. temperature sort of way.   
That was probably why he was intimidated by Will.. right? 

Next to Will, Nico thought he looked like a trainwreck. His pale skin barely held its olive undertones anymore, his eyes were dark and.. scary. Gods, his eyebags were even worse. He was sickly, thin, and.. short. Gods, so much shorter than Will. It was just his own fears and insecurities, but.. He was just so nervous around Will. 

Nico sighed, slowly removing his shirt, awaiting the impending doom.   
" **Nico**."   
_Ah_. Nico flinched.   
He knew that tone of voice.  
Will trudged his way over to the smaller, placing his hand on his back.   
" _How many times have I told you that this isn't safe!_ " Will groaned, beginning to search for the end of the messy bundle of bandages wrapped aroud Nico's chest.   
"..A lot..?" Nico offered nervously, fidgeting with his shirt in his hands.   
"I _knew_ there was more to why you sounded so winded.." Will mumbled, unwrapping the bandages slowly. "You told me you wouldn't do this anymore."   
"It's hard, Will!" Nico grumbled, turning to face the taller blonde.

Will tried to ignore the fact that it was kinda cute that Nico had to look upward to face him. 

"I don't..! I don't like.." He gestured towards himself nervously. "I'm weird looking and..it makes it even worse that I have.. _those_." He groaned.   
"That doesn't mean it's better to put yourself at risk and your health in danger!" Will sighed. "You know I went through what you're going through, Nico.." He spoke softly. "I had my mom send me a package and it should have arrived earlier today.. I got distracted by our.." He cleared his throat. "By uhm.. us hanging out and stuff."   
Nico crossed his arms, averting his gaze towards the wall.   
The green torches on the walls flickered.   
Nico was.. indeed upset.   
"What does a _package_ have to do with _me_?" He spat out.   
"I asked her to send me some specific things to uh..help you." Will shifted nervously. "Do you think you could wait here while I go get it? I promise I won't be long."   
Nico met Will's gaze for a moment before giving a quick nod, shoving his shirt back over his head. He made his way towards his bed, face planting into it with a small bounce.   
Will smiled at the sight before turning and making his way out of the Hades cabin. 

─❀*̥˚──◌─❀*̥˚

Will was desperately trying his best to not fall over as he sprinted towards his cabin. He was trying to get there as quick as possible and _leave_ as quick as possible. Gods knows how many campers saw Nico earlier- he was _not_ in the mood to talk to anyone about what happened. 

He burst into the cabin, his head looking around frantically for the package.  
 _Aha!_  
He rushed over to his bed before swooping the box into his arms. 

"Annnd what is that exactly?" A voice spoke from behind.   
Will flinched, almost hitting the other as he spun around. "Austin!" Will frowned at the sight of his (technical) younger brother. "Not cool."   
"You're the one that didn't notice I was here." He grinned. "Now.. the box?"  
Will rolled his eyes. "Just a package from my mom. It has stuff to help Nico out.. I talked to you about it in the infirmary."   
Austin hummed, patting the box gently. "Oh yeah.. I remember now.. that's real sweet of her."   
Will blushed slightly. His mom really was a doll.. She had her ups and downs, like most parents, but she was always super supportive. 

Will had realized he was..different at a very young age. He never fit into that certain criteria and..   
He didn't like girly clothes.   
Will had barely entered 2nd grade when his mother realized he didn't want to go to school anymore. He had been relentlessly bullied by the other kids for "dressing like a boy."  
Dear Naomi, she just wanted her child to be happy. After a series of doctor's appointments, they recommended they see a therapist so Will could be able to speak for himself freely.  
He was too nervous to speak exactly how he felt towards his mother.  
He has been labeled as a tomboy for a few years and..well. That just didn't feel right. 

After a few sessions, Will opened up about how he actively felt. He wasn't a girl- he was a boy and he _knew_ he was one.. it just made sense to him.   
It was a rough session for both him and his mother when his therapist had given her the news.  
Naomi had cried, and Will was terrified that she was angry with him.   
The car ride home was tense. He was ready to hide away in his room, but she stopped him dead in his tracks.

  
 _"My sweet baby boy, why didn't you tell mama sooner? Your happiness is what's most important to me."_

Will smiled fondly at the memory. 

He had ran over towards his mother and she embraced him in her arms.   
He had grown up in Austin, Texas- it was a fairly progressive area, but it was still the South. He thought.. his mother would have been upset with him. He let his emotions unbottle and let himself cry in his mother's embrace.   
Naomi ran her hands through his hair, cooing and shushing her son. Will hugged her tightly.  
"Did you have a name you would prefer, darlin'?" She spoke softly. "It's okay if not, you can always take your time."   
Will sniffed, pulling back to face his mother. She was looking back at him with fond eyes and the sweetest smile. A small smile tugged at his lips as he looked away bashfully. "I..wanted mama's help for a name."   
"Oh?"  
He nodded. "When I was younger, you said a certain name that you were gonna give me if I was a boy..and well..." His words trailed off.   
She laughed softly. "Because you are a boy, you want that name?"  
Will nodded slowly. Naomi moved to kiss his forehead gently. "I think William suits you very well, sweetheart. A lovely name for my lovely son."   
Will beamed happily and hugged his mother tightly. 

Soon afterwards, Naomi had pulled Will out of public school so he could start transitioning slowly. Public school had given him a lot of anxiety, and Naomi had decided that she would rather Will be happy. Will did a year of homeschooling before changing to an entirely different district. There, everyone knew him as _Will_ and.. Gods, it was amazing. 

He owed everything to his mother. She helped him start T in middle school, helped him raise funds for top a few years ago as well.   
Naomi Solace was the closest thing to an Angel on earth.

Will shook himself out of his thoughts, realizing he had probably been standing there smiling for wayy too long. "Oh uh..anyways." He laughed nervously. "I'm gonna go..bring these to Nico."   
He hulled the box up in his arms, making his way towards the door.   
"Uh huh?" Austin grinned."You sure do care a lot about him, hm?"   
Will felt the heat creep up from his neck to his cheeks. They were _not_ talking about _that_ right now.  
"He's my patient.." Will mumbled. He had made his way halfway out of the doorway when he heard his half brother snort and laugh.

"Duuude.. you are so fucking whipped." 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading! I really really appreciate it. I'm having a lot of fun writing this fic so far. Thank you for all the love & support. ♡


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